According to the Bible marriage is ordained of God. There are several Biblical reasons for marriage, and they are intertwined. God, through his Word, shares His reasons for marriage in both the Old and New testaments.
Examining the Biblical Purpose of Marriage
Proverbs 18:22
“Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.” (KJV)
When a man obtains a wife, he then becomes a husband, and God promises to bless both of them. Marriage is God’s plan for people.
Jesus’ first miracle recorded in God’s Word was a blessing at a marriage in the Gospel of John, chapter two.
Biblical Reasons for Marriage – Human Companionship
The first marriage recorded was in the Old Testament in Genesis 2:21-25.
The institution of marriage was given on the sixth day of the creation week. God started by systematically creating a beautiful world. When everything was just about perfect, He cumulated His creation with His most exquisite creature — Woman.
Some Bible scholars say that the creation of man was the crown of God’s creation, and that may be correct. But the jewel in the crown was the woman.
After God created the first man, and Adam named the animals, Adam and God looked over all of the fascinating creatures, but Adam could find among the animal population any that was compatible to him.
Genesis 2:20
“And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.” (KJV)
Adam was the only human in the world filled with tame, playful, and friendly animals. But in all of the animal kingdom, there was nothing that was similar to him. Both Adam and God knew that, and God realized there was a problem. While each animal had its similar mate, Adam was alone.
In Genesis 2:18, God made an interesting statement, “And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.” (KJV)
(Side note on a pet peeve: The words “help meet” are two distinct words, which means a helper, a suitable partner. There is no such word in Scripture as “helpmeet.”)
God then continued His creation process, this time utilizing part of Adam.
Genesis 2:21-23
“And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” (KJV)
God specifically created woman from Adam’s rib. This symbolized that a good wife is a companion to her husband, and symbolically, she is to be by his side.
God did not create woman from Adam’s head for her to rule over him, or from his foot for him to rule over her. Rather, this act of creation shows two people living as friends, complimenting each other, male and female, and able to reproduce.
It was God’s design to specifically craft a woman for Adam. When God brought the first woman to Adam, He also performed the first marriage ceremony.
Genesis 2:23
“And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” (KJV)
Commenting on this first marriage, the writer of the Book of Genesis gives this example to be emulated by men and women throughout the future centuries, as written in
Genesis 2:24,
“Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” (KJV)
God says that the husband — not the boyfriend, or the fiancé — needs to love his wife. And the wife — not the girlfriend, or the fiancée — has the responsibility to give her husband reverence.
Ephesians 5:33
“Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.” (KJV)
Another verse where God commands husbands to love their wives, which is an integral part of companionship is found in
Ephesians 5:28
“So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.” (KJV)
Biblical Reason for Marriage – A Protective Covenant
Marriage is a sacred covenant between two people. This covenant relationship is a legal relationship that protects both parties.
A male and a female can function as friends, help, and complement each other, and even reproduce, but this is not a marriage until and unless they have a made a legal covenant commitment.
Whether or not this is accomplished with a traditional marriage ceremony, or some other proper, legal formalities, marriage is more than just enjoying each other’s company, having an intimate relationship, living at the same address, or having children.
While all of the above can be accomplished to some degree with a contract, God designed marriage not to be a contract, but rather, a legal covenant, which actually protects both parties.
God intended marriage to be a lifelong commitment and that is why He uses the word “covenant,” instead of contract.
Malachi 2:14
Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the LORD hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy youth, against whom thou hast dealt treacherously: yet is she thy companion, and the wife of thy covenant. (KJV)
According to Family Life there are three main differences between a covenant and a contract. These are:
- A covenant is based on trust between parties. A contract is based on distrust.
- A covenant is based on unlimited responsibility. A contract is based on limited liability.
- A covenant cannot be broken if new circumstances occur. A contract can be voided by mutual consent.
Examining these differences between a covenant and a contract shows why God called marriage a covenant, and not a contract. God said that through the legal covenant of marriage, He makes two individuals become one flesh.
Matthew 19:6
“Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.” (KJV)
This verse shows the covenant relationship, rather than the contract, of a legal marriage.
Two people may make a covenant with each other, but God then seals that covenant by making two individuals into one flesh. Attempting to break this marriage covenant that God has sealed by making the two into one is just as detrimental to both as amputating a body part.
Despite this covenant relationship, some married people will attempt to break their agreement, or decide that they personally will not honor their part of the covenant. In such a case, God reiterates the covenant, rather than the contract aspect of a legal marriage.
1 Corinthians 7:10-11
“And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband: But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife.” (KJV)
With the covenant aspect in mind, a partner who has resolved to treat the marriage as a contract and break that promise, God says the one being offended is “not under bondage.”
1 Corinthians 7:15
“But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.” (KJV)
Bible scholars have wrestled with the clause “not under bondage” for centuries. Using the covenant aspect of marriage in this situation, the interpretation is not for the offended party to dissolve the existing marriage and remarry someone else, but rather, the offended partner has little or no obligation to support the spouse who insisted on their departure.
This seems to be explained in Mark 10:9:
“What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.” (KJV)
Biblical Reasons for Marriage – To Avoid Fornication
Fornication is sexual intimacy outside the bonds of matrimony — sexual immorality. God created sexual desire, and as such, He expects His people to use and enjoy the sexual relationship. But like most things in this world, God has both rules and regulations concerning this important aspect of marital bliss.
It is normal for a man to be attracted to a woman, and vice versa — this is the sex drive. God deigned males and females like this, but He also gave rules, and one of them is found in
1 Corinthians 7:1b
“It is good for a man not to touch a woman.” (KJV)
One of the primary purposes of marriage is the proper place and relationship to fulfill the God-given, natural sexual desires. God says this specifically in
1 Corinthians 7:2-4
Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.” (KJV)
Another verse regarding the purpose of marriage as related to the natural sex drive is found in
1 Corinthians 7:9
“But if they [a widow or an unmarried individual] cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.” (KJV)
On the same topic of sex and marriage, the Apostle Paul says in
1 Corinthians 7:36
“But if any man think that he behaveth himself uncomely toward his virgin, if she pass the flower of her age, and need so require, let him do what he will, he sinneth not: let them marry.” (KJV)
When an unmarried individual or couple has a sexual need, in order to gain sexual fulfillment and satisfaction, God says to get married. There is a committed, legal covenant relationship, and sexual union can be freely enjoyed with both partners benefiting.
Another reference to marriage as the place for fulfilling the sexual desire is found in book of Hebrews.
Hebrews 13:4
“Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.” (KJV)
God says that sex is honorable, but only within the God-ordained institution of marriage. While God encourages sexual intimacy within marriage, i.e., the marriage bed, at the same time He promises that He will judge those who practice sexual immorality.
The convent relationship of marriage is what God designed for sexual benefit and enjoyment. One of the results of having sex is reproduction.
Biblical Reasons for Marriage — Reproduction
Two people who feel they cannot live without each other, who graciously submit themselves to each other in companionship, and who then enter into a lifelong, covenant relationship, which among other joys, have the blessing of fulfilling their individual sex desires, very often leads to yet another blessing and Biblical reasons for marriage, and that is in having children.
Children can be brought into the world without all of the above, even by avoiding the institution of marriage, but one of the Biblical reasons for marriage is for a safe, comforting, protective environment to raise children.
Children, produced through the God-ordained institute of marriage, are referred to in the highly symbolic words found in
Proverbs 5:16
“Let thy fountains be dispersed abroad, and rivers of waters in the streets.”
The word “fountains,” according to Bible scholars, means children, legitimate children from married parents, rather than illegitimate children.
Another verse proclaiming the benefits of children from parents who are married to each other is in Psalm 128:3:
“Thy wife shall be as a fruitful vine by the sides of thine house: thy children like olive plants round about thy table.” (KJV)
Having children through the institution of marriage helps the parents to raise them according to the command of God in
Ephesians 6:4
“And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.” (KJV)
The Old Testament gives more detail about what to teach children. Obeying this command is easiest when the parents are married to each other and live together with their children.
Deuteronomy 6:7
“And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.” (KJV)
The Old Testament Book of Malachi indicates that having children in the marriage relationship is to produce godly offspring.
Malachi 2:15
“And did not he make one? Yet had he the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That he might seek a godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth.”
Biblical Reasons for Marriage — A Pattern of Christ and the Church
Marriage is an intimate relationship between two people. Jesus Christ uses this special, human partnership to illustrate His spiritual relationship between Himself and His people.
The Church is composed of all individuals who have accepted Him as their Savior. This spiritual body composed of physical humans began at the time of Pentecost, recorded in the Book of Acts, chapter 2, and to the present day. Jesus Christ will continue to add people to His church, which is His body, according to Colossians 1:18 and 1:24, until He comes again in the Rapture.
In order to help humans understand this spiritual body, the Bible uses the institution of marriage as an example. A Christian’s relationship with Jesus Christ is a spiritual bond. Just as each partner in a physical marriage needs communication and attention, so, too, do Christians need to communicate with, and serve, Jesus Christ with love.
Interestingly enough, as Christian married individuals seek to communicate and serve each other in their marital commitment, as they do this, they are also serving Jesus Christ.
Since humans are made in God’s own image, it is not too farfetched to see how Christian marriage corresponds with the relationship between Christ and His church, which is His body:
- Christ desires companionship. He walked and talked with Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden, so now He adds people who desire to communicate with Him in prayer, just as He communicates with them through His holy Word.
- Physical marriage is a lifetime commitment. Being part of the body of Christ is permanent as well.
- The husband is to give himself for his wife. Jesus Christ died for His church.
- Just as marriage meets sexual needs, so, too, does Jesus Christ meet the spiritual need that all humans have. Man is a spiritual creature, and Christ gives the answer, and the focus for our spiritual worship.
- Physical marriage is the incubator for physical reproduction. Through Jesus Christ, His children can take His gift of salvation to others in this lost world so that they, too, can become part of His body. This is spiritual reproduction.
The Apostle Paul sums up the correlation between a healthy marriage in modern times and the example of Christ’s church in
Ephesians 5:31-32
“For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.” (KJV)
Paul admits that the correlation between marriage and Christ’s church is a profound mystery, and possibly one that he could not fully understand. Yet he knew that this symbolism was a primary purpose of marriage.
Considering these Biblical reasons for marriage helps us to understand that marriage is a serious step, one that is exciting when done correctly, and a source of many blessings, both physical and spiritual, from God.
To learn more about what the Bible says about marriage, check out Marriage According to the Bible – the Proverbs 31 Woman.
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